Oklahoma City bombing victim’s son reflects on 30 years of healing and resilience

As Oklahoma marks 30 years since the Oklahoma City bombing, Ivan Martinez is honoring the father he never got to know. Gilbert Martinez was among the 168 people killed in the April 19, 1995, attack—just 10 days after Ivan was born.

Son of Oklahoma City Bombing Victim Honors Father’s Legacy 30 Years Later

Gilbert Martinez was in the Social Security office at the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building, helping a couple from his church, when the bomb went off. His youngest son Ivan, now 30, has spent his life learning about a father he never got to meet.

“So I think it really started hitting me around middle school timing, seventh, eighth grade. I started getting into sports and some extracurricular activities such as band. I got into football, basketball, and often, you know, those events or tournaments and or outings, parents would show up to support their kids. And I often always did get my mom to come out to some events...but, you know, the fatherhood aspect—such as like an eighth grade formal dance where they had a dad and son dance—I never even brought that up to my family because I felt, you know, that the absentee wasn’t worth bringing up.”

“So there’s been a couple times like that and most relevant has been, you know, the day before my wedding. I think it really hit me hard. I was looking for a, you know, kind of a father-son speech or some sort of, you know, male figure in my life to give me some sort of motivation before my big day. And that, you know, that absentee I really felt as an adult stepping forward into my life. And then as of recent, you know, my firstborn is Antonio Xavier Martinez, my baby. His birthday is April 1st, actually. And, you know, on the birth of him, I really felt his absence as well.”

Life Milestones Without a Father

Ivan says his father’s absence was most deeply felt on the eve of his wedding and again with the birth of his own son, Antonio Xavier, earlier this month.

“It just kind of went full circle really fast whenever my son was born. So just bringing a perspective, I’m 30, I’m turning 30 this year. My dad was 35 when he passed and he was on his fifth kid and I’m on my first. So it just brought everything into perspective of how, you know, how fast life goes.”

A Mother’s Strength and Family Resilience

Ivan’s mother, left to raise five children alone, was just a teenager when she had her first child.

“Psychologically, it still affects our family quite a bit, but my mother is the strongest woman I know based off her story. Nobody is perfect. It’s hard to raise five kids alone. So I show my mom a lot of grace because I know everything she went through. You know, not everything is perfect. In those kinds of decisions with five kids growing up, you’re going to have avenues that you don’t know answered.”

“Psychologically, it was a huge loss for my mom and my siblings feel it more than I since I was only 10 days. But my mom definitely reflects upon her husband’s death quite often. And she says she sees a lot of him and me, which makes me really happy.”

Family Tradition and Memorial Tribute

Each year, the Martinez family travels from across the country to attend the remembrance ceremony at the Oklahoma City National Memorial. This year, on the 30th anniversary, they plan to wear baby blue—Gilbert’s favorite color.

“Yeah, so actually my family from Brownsville, Texas, is immediate family. My aunt is my dad’s only sibling and her name is Aunt Janie. She’s bringing the whole family from Brownsville, which is very significant to us. We’re really close to that side of the family.”

“She brought up the idea of wearing, you know, baby blue the day of the memorial. That was my dad’s favorite color, from what I was told. So our whole family will be wearing baby blue.”

“This is our consecutive anniversary appearance of the bombing that we go to as a family. We haven’t missed one.”

“Since I’ve been—I turned 30, you know, this year—it’s the 30th anniversary, so 10 days after my birthday we have, you know, we remember my father’s passing. But it’s also a good moment to catch up with family from, you know, out of state that come and pay their respects for my dad.”

Scholarships That Changed Their Lives

Ivan credits the Survivors’ Education Fund for helping him and his siblings achieve their college degrees.

“Me and my sisters talk about it all the time, and my brother. It’s tragic to say this, but we don’t believe that we would gain our opportunities in the workforce and education if it wasn’t for the Survivors Education Fund.”

“With school being so expensive, our family was very low income and in our Oklahoma City. And with five of us and then including six of my stepsister now, educational opportunities are far in between, really challenging to pay for.”

“So I don’t think any of us would be in the position we’re in without the Survivors Fund.”

How to Watch the 30th Anniversary Ceremony

The 30th Annual Oklahoma City Bombing Remembrance Ceremony is scheduled for 8:45 a.m. on Saturday, April 19, at the Oklahoma City National Memorial. The event will be streamed live on News On 6.