Should you talk to a divorce attorney before deciding to separate? Oklahoma lawyer explains

Thinking about separating from your partner? An Oklahoma family law attorney explains when it's time to talk to a divorce lawyer, even if you're not ready to file.

Attorney offers legal advice for couples considering separation

Cordell & Cordell family law attorney Colby Pierce joined News On 6 to talk about why someone might meet with a divorce attorney before they've decided to separate and what signs could indicate it's time to speak to a lawyer.

Q: Why would someone talk to a divorce lawyer if they’re not sure they want to go that direction?

A: “It’s about getting information,” said Pierce. “People, when they come in for a consultation, I meet with people all the time. Sometimes they’re ready to go ahead and proceed to file. Sometimes they’re just there to figure out what their rights and options are. It’s never a bad idea to get information. You know, knowledge is power.”

Q: Could talking to a lawyer actually prevent a messy divorce later on?

A: “It certainly can,” Pierce said. “When people don’t have, you know, information, they tend to act emotionally, right? And especially in a situation that is driven by high emotions and conflict. So when you get information early and you have an expectation of, okay, this is how this is going to work… then people typically with that knowledge can act more rationally.”

Q: What red flags might suggest it’s time to consult with an attorney?

A: “The big ones obviously being domestic violence or towards spouse or towards kids,” Pierce said. “Those are big things. You probably need to get police involvement at that time, but it’s definitely time to see an attorney in the event something like that’s going on.”

“Some smaller things might be financial secrecy, you know, if you find out somebody has an account that you weren’t aware of, or they’re being very controlling over the finances, meaning they’re not letting you have access. Another one would be, you know, threats to keep the kids away. If those things are happening, talk to an attorney.”

Q: What common mistakes do people make when they’re considering ending a relationship?

A: “The list is endless,” Pierce said. “Knowledge is power. When you don’t have that information, then you tend to make mistakes that can sometimes be hard for an attorney to fix down the road.”

“Signing over assets prior to the divorce case being started, getting custody arrangements that may not be in the best interest of your child, but you’re doing it because you’re acting in a state of emotion… getting that information early is key. That way you can act logically and without those emotional ties when it really matters.”

Q: Why is it important to avoid signing documents without legal guidance?

A: “It’s better to not sign it at all,” Pierce said. “If you talk to the attorney ahead of time, you’d know, ‘Hey, I probably shouldn’t sign something without knowing what it says.’ But it happens, and then we have to come in and fix it, and that can be difficult to do down the road.”